Surviving a Breakup
You have just broken up with someone you really care about – In fact your thinking that you maybe even loved this person -- How can you mend a broken heart? Here are a few tips to help you start.
So you just ended your relationship and your heart is breaking. It’s a deep and relentless hurting you just can’t seem to escape. It affects all of your thoughts, energy, appetite and even your sleep. You used to think that old phrase “ a broken heart” was simply a metaphor but now you’re not so sure anymore since there’s an actual nagging throb of a pain somewhere in the vicinity of your, heart.
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Does any of this ring a bell with you, sound familiar? If you’re suffering the after effects of a long and painful break-up, there are no quick fixes or easy solutions to nurse your wounds back to normal. It just plain hurts. But that doesn’t mean there aren’t steps you can take to start the healing process. |
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Here are a few strategies to help you one your way: It’s time to summon your endorphins to work a little overtime. The human body produces endorphins as a natural painkiller. This phenomena is a God-given biochemistry that is far healthier and more effective than any synthetic treatments. Exercise is probably the one of the best ways to experience the rush of endorphins. So it’s time to start working up a sweat and get the blood pumping. Go for a jog or try taking a long bike ride or a swim or a hike in the mountains. It’s a proven fact that one of the best ways to mend a broken heart is to get your heart pumping and the more the better.
Keep an eye out for emotional landmines. When a person is in pain they are often gluttons for punishment. They like to wallow in thoughts of the good old days and try to make them selves feel better by thinking of better days, they do things like rereading old love letters or looking at pictures of happier times. They try to return to places where meaningful and once romantic events took place. While nursing a wounded heart, it’s best to make every effort to try and avoid reminders of your recently ended relationship. Maybe someday it will be helpful to meander—and mourn—down memory lane. But during this period of acute heartache, give yourself a break and let the past stay in the past.
Bottle up your inner Eeyore. That voice inside you that starts to sound like Snuggly Bears pessimistic buddy? It’s easy to give free reign to your inner Eeyore, but now is an excellent time to silence those gloomy declarations. The next time you find yourself with thoughts like "I can’t imagine going forward without this person as part of my life" or "This is all my fault, it must be there’s something wrong with me," make a conscious decision to erase this script. |
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I’m not saying that you should give yourself puffed-up pep talks or phony flattery--just make an intentional effort to tell yourself the truth: “Try thinking thoughts like yes, I am pretty sad and am feeling a great loss, but I’ll get through this and move on to bigger and better things, I’ll find joy again.”
This is a great time to lean on those who love you the most. When people feel down and depressed, most of us just want to crawl under our blanket and lick our wounds. “We want to be left alone so we can wallow in our sorrow!” Resist this temptation to isolate yourself. After all, suffering in silence will only prolong the pain. Its better to get in touch with people who care about you. Surround you’re self with supportive people, share your thoughts and give your self-esteem a boost.
Most of us at some point will experience heartache and hurt. Fortunately, there are things you can do to speed up your recovery process and regain your sense of joy, hope, and purpose.
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